PANAMA CITY — No one seemed to see it coming before John Bowen, 46, shot and killed his long-time girlfriend Donna Merendino,44, twice with a short-barrel shotgun before turning the gun to end his own life on Sept. 26.
The murder-suicide of the Southport couple was the most recent domestic violence fatality to occur in Bay County among the 75 to 80 nonfatal incidents deputies respond to each month.
“That’s the biggest victimization in this area,” said Chevina Jackson, victim advocate with the Sheriff’s Office.
Bowen and Merendino did not have a history of domestic violence with the Sheriff’s Office, and this type of tragedy is not common in the area.
But as the calendar rolled over from 2011 to 2012, a rash of six domestic fatalities changed the way the domestic violence unit thought of their work.
“We’re also a homicide prevention unit,” said investigator Lt. Koren Colbert.
Jackson and Colbert presented at the 2014 Domestic Violence Seminar hosted by the Sheriff’s Office on Saturday. October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.
Deputies partnered with nonprofits to introduce community resources and services available to help turn victims into survivors. Speakers gave an overview of domestic violence, taught how to make a plan for safety, taught self-defense and talked about legal action taken in these cases.
Domestic violence is abusive behavior in a relationship in which people live together, such as a family or intimate relationship. Violence can be sexual, physical, emotional, economic or psychological in nature and covers a wide range of threatening or harmful behavior used by abusers to gain control of a victim.
Violence is commonly linked to substance abuse, alcoholism, unemployment and mental illness, especially in the elderly population.
Currently, about one in four women in the county are affected by domestic violence. Jackson said a rising trend involves people from outside the area.
“They may have met someone on a social media site and got here and realized they weren’t Prince Charming,” she said.
Colbert said abusers have been held more accountable in recent years by evidence-based prosecution by the state in certain cases in which victims chose not to press charges.
“Domestic violence and sexual battery is something we tend to blame on the victim,” Jackson said.
Often, victims write off abuse as an anger problem.
“It’s not an anger management issue,” Colbert said. “The abuser is choosing to direct their anger toward the victim, which is usually an intimate partner.”
She also said the most dangerous time for victims is when leaving, which is why having a plan and resources is so vital.
Jackson said victims generally don’t leave abusive situations as soon as they’d like to see.
“On average, it takes a woman about seven times to leave her abuser,” Colbert said,
Too often, a fear of dying is what finally makes the victim leave.
“The best advice I have that women need to get is that these people do not change,” she said. “You can’t love him through it.”